I don’t know about you, but I have found my nemesis.  I think we all have one.  Mine seems to defeat me when I go to some very special places.  I don’t ever seem to know when to stop.  I tell myself I might hurt the cook’s feelings, and we sure don’t want to be wasteful.  Of course, I have to get my money’s worth.  I must find an excuse somewhere.  Have you guessed what my nemesis is?  You guessed it!  The notorious buffet restaurant, or so I thought anyway.

I must be honest.  It doesn’t have to be a buffet bar for me to be gluttonous.  I often overeat when I cook the meal myself.  I guess I am treading on dangerous ground here.  I am revealing a definite weakness in my life.

I want to take you on an adventure with me.  I had an experience a few months back that got my attention.  I was praying for something important to me and have been for quite some time.  In my quest to have an answer to this prayer request, I began to learn many things about myself.

There are many things I enjoy doing besides eating.  I have a full plate in better ways than just my food.  I enjoy the ministry God has given me, and I especially enjoy my family.  Of course, my favorite ministry and hobby is my husband.  My life gets very busy sometimes.  It is hard to find a quiet moment.

I pray when I am alone in the car, when I brush my teeth, when I am lying in bed, and other times when I have a moment to spare.  I read my Bible when I prepare my devotions for my students.  As you can see, my personal time with God is a hit-and-miss type of situation.  I am sure God enjoys every moment I spend with Him, but I know He wants more.

I was praying for this special request one day, and I stopped long enough to hear His still small voice.  I was asking Him why He had not answered my prayer request.  In no uncertain terms, He said, “I didn’t know it was important to you.” 

I asked Him, “How could you not think it was important to me?  I have been asking you for this for a long time.” 

He gently said, “I haven’t noticed it making a difference in your life.”

I am not saying this is a requirement for God to hear our prayers, but there are a couple of areas in my life I have struggled with since I was young.  I knew these areas had to come in subjection for me to grow in my Christian walk.

“…let us lay aside every weight, and sin which doth so easily beset us, and let us run with patience the race that is set before us.”  Hebrews 12:1

The besetting sin is the one that keeps us from a victorious Christian life.  The weights are the sins that we carry around and pull out from time to time.  It is like running a race where you have a bag full of weights on your shoulders.  In my life, the bag was the besetting sin, and the weights were the individual battles I was fighting.  I knew what the Lord was conveying to me.  He said, “Why aren’t you any closer to letting Me help you defeat these areas that are weighing you down?  How many years have these same battles been continuing?  You can have so much more out of your Christian walk.”

Wow!  What a blow!  I told God I thought I was doing pretty good.  He says, “I want more for you.”  At that time, my quest began to defeat this area once and for all.  Have you ever thought you knew what your nemesis or enemy was in your life, yet you found out later it was so much worse than you thought?  My adventure took me to all kinds of places. Places I never realized existed.

I said, “Ok, Lord, until we get this thing licked, I will give up_____.”  We all have something that gets ahead of God, so that blank could be anything.  I just knew where I needed to start.

He said, “OK!  It is a start.”  Things were going well for a few days.  I was sitting at my desk one day, and I started to ____.  He whispered, “What about that?” 

I said, “This too, Lord.”

He said, “Yes, that too.”

I reluctantly said, “OK…this, too.”  Mind you, over a few days, He continued to push one more weight aside.

I was praying more earnestly because every time I thought of the item I had chosen to give up, I prayed for my prayer request.  I was constantly asking God to teach me and help me to have the discipline to do as He had shown me.  He said, “You need to read My Word more.”

I said, “When? When is their time?”

He said, “You always have time for_____.”

I said, “But, Lord.”  Then I realized I did this every day, and it would be a good place to start.

As I began to read my Bible for answers to my questions, and not just to prepare for devotions for my students, my Heavenly Father began to answer my questions one by one.  When I prepared devotions for my students, I learned a great deal, but I was searching for answers for teenagers.

As I was studying and praying, I realized my nemesis was not food or misuse of my tongue.  They were weights in the bag.  I learned my nemesis was self.  Self-discipline is the key to conquering my weights and my besetting sin.  I guess it would be better put as God-discipline.  God needs to be the discipline in my life.  He needs to call the shots.  I do not know where this adventure will take me, but I hope it never stops.

I have not conquered the buffet bar, nor have I conquered the other weights in my bag, but the bag is lighter than it was.  I hope, by God’s grace, one day the bag and the weights will be gone.  In the meantime, the weights are slowly getting lighter, and I have learned so much in the last few months.  Each new challenge in my adventure has brought me closer to victory.

Let us set aside your weights and your besetting sin so your weights can be lighter.  We all need to take the challenge of Hebrews 12:1.

Mrs. Worthington has five children and twelve grandchildren.  She serves as Principal of Pathway Christian Academy in Goldsboro.