“What are you thinking?” As I look into those beautiful brown eyes, I can’t help but wonder. “What are you thinking?” You are so beautiful and helpless. We are about to start a new adventure. They didn’t give your dad and me a manual at the hospital. I want to be the best mother I can possibly be. I want to be there for you and raise you for God’s glory. They say babies don’t really think a lot. But I know better. I can feel the love oozing from your skin and through those beautiful eyes. I love you so.
Time has passed now and you are learning to walk. My, how many times you have stumbled! I tried to keep you from hurting yourself, but I didn’t quite make it every time. You are able to run and play and you even enjoy playing with the other children. Sharing is giving you a hard time. Your favorite line is, “I can do it myself.” I have to marvel at how fast you have grown and how much you have learned. My heart melts when you lift your hands and motion for me to pick you up. You whisper, “I love you, Mommy,”as you doze off to sleep. Oh, how I treasure those words and the assurance that they come from your heart.
Time to start school! You are all dressed and ready to go. We have prayer, and I remind you that Jesus will be watching over you. This gives me great comfort, because my little one is going to be away from me all day. That has only happened with Grandma before now. As I drop you off at your classroom, my heart sinks. My child doesn’t have to have me around all the time anymore. I can’t wait to pick you up in the afternoon, secretly hoping you had missed me half as much as I had missed you. Well, you’re home, and you’re all excited. You can’t wait to tell me the neat things you learned at school today. You really like your teacher. I am so glad, but a part of me is a little jealous. It brings me great comfort as you say, “I missed you too, Mommy. I love you!” My heart still soars at those beautiful words.
You are almost as tall as me now. You are always fussing with your brothers and sisters. There is no giving in. But when someone messes with them, you will come out fighting. Your body is growing very fast. Soon you will be a teenager. The questions you can ask! I wonder if you just ask questions for the fun of it. The most important thing that has happened to you during these years is that you have accepted Christ. In fact, this is the most exciting thing that has ever happened to you. I hope your love for Christ grows, and you will be a shining star for Him. Your relationship with Christ will enable you to love others more. So when you tell me you love me, it has a deeper meaning. I will never tire of hearing those priceless words.
Well, it’s here! Those teenage years everyone has been telling me about. I guess you have had your moments of rebellion, but fortunately, they were short-lived. Overall, you have been a great teenager. All of your brothers and sisters have. Thankfully, we made it all the way through your learner’s permit without going in the ditch. I cried every time your heart was broken. I don’t think you always knew that. It was real hard not to paper their yards, but I had to set the example. Of course, you had your share of breaking their hearts, too. For one thing I was grateful, you never thought you were too old to say, “I love you.” You never got mad when I wanted you to call home to let me know you were on the way so I could know you were safe. Then I prayed you all the way home. I think you thought you knew how much I loved you.
Now you are grown and have a full time job. Boy, we have a busy house! We are always coming and going like a revolving door. As most of us do, you have made your share of mistakes, but we move on and learn from them. You are working where you believe God wants you. You are respecting the rules of the house and pulling your share of the load. You attend church faithfully, and you will one day find a mate and settle down. I know that day will come soon. A mother couldn’t be more proud of a child than I am of you. Every time you give me a hug and tell me you love me, it still makes my heart swell. One might think it would bust. Sometimes I feel it might.
You are a parent now, which means I am a grandma. The word just gives me great pride. To hold my grandchild in my arms is the best feeling. The only thing to compare it to was when you were born, but it is still different. God gives a special ministry to grandparents. I only hope I am worthy of the title. When my grandchild tells me, “I love you,”my heart just soars. But that doesn’t change how much it means to me when you say, “I love you.” Your love means so much to me. Since you have a child of your own, I know you are experiencing everything I have been talking about.
You have grown children now. That means I must be getting older. Your dad is still preaching, and I am in his amen corner. There is one thing for sure, I am really proud of all of my grandchildren. They have honored us with their lives. Proverbs17:6tells us that our crown will be our grandchildren. A truer statement was never made. Of course, I am not foolish enough to believe that I know all things, but I believe in your children as well as my other grandchildren. I know you try to protect me from things that would hurt. It bothers your dad and me that you have to help us so much. I remind him how much he enjoyed helping his dad as he got weaker. Thank you for driving us to church every Sunday. I think your dad would be miserable if he couldn’t preach. You have been such a good child. I guess you never stop being your mother’s child, even if you are in your fifties.
Don’t be sad! I am going to be with your dad and Jesus now. I remember looking in your eyes for the first time. I thought I could never love you more than I did at that moment. I have learned that love grows day by day. With each new experience and each new adventure, love grows. No matter how many children you have and how they behave, the love just keeps growing. Does your capacity to love ever stop? I don’t think so, as long as you keep opening your heart. One piece of advice I leave you. As you open your heart and let Christ love others through you, never stop telling others how much you love them. No matter what they do, tell them you love them. I am weary, and I need to rest. I hope this letter has helped you know how much I love you and helped you realize how much hearing the words, “I love you,” has meant to me over the years. “I love you, my child.”
I will love you always, even more from Heaven,
Mom