The first day of school is right around the corner. With each new school term, the Lord always sends us a great batch of kids. We have some who have been with us for years, and others who are here for the very first time. We always miss the ones that leave us. Most left for reasons beyond their control, but it is still sad for all of us at Pathway when they are gone. We love all of our students so there is a hole in our hearts when they leave. We hope the best for them, wherever they may be.
God always sends me a new challenge with each school year. I am excited and maybe a little apprehensive to find out what it will be this year. I am finding with each additional year that passes, I need to be stronger and more versed in the things that are going on around me. My students have real struggles. They are exposed to the same difficulties of young people of the past, but they are experiencing them in the digital world.
I have watched some of our young people grow up at Pathway. One of our seniors last year was with us since she was four. In fact, one of our teachers started our preschool program with us when she was four and has been teaching at Pathway for nine years and has three children of her own. I have observed many changes that occur as a child grows up. One thing I have noticed is the way they view each other. I have had the privilege of watching many children go from thinking the opposite sex is awful to looking at each other with stars in their eyes. That’s when the trouble starts. There is awkwardness when this stage begins. A boy might pick at a girl in an attempt to get her to notice him. She gets upset and I tell her, “He just thinks you are cute.” Of course, she looks at me like I am crazy, but she is thinking, “He is kind of cute.” This has not changed over the years. Young people are awkward around the opposite sex, at least at first.
But I have found something interesting that has changed. Two people will say they are “going out.” For those that are not in the know, that means they are boyfriend and girlfriend. I am puzzled because I don’t see them hanging out at lunch or breaks together. I don’t notice them looking at each other. Ok! I am dense, but how is this possible? Then I am enlightened! “Oh, Mrs. Worthington! They are texting each other when they are not at school.” So, when you like a guy or a girl you text them instead of talk to them. No wonder many young people have trouble communicating. They say things with the keyboard instead of with their words and their eyes. People say things with a keyboard that they wouldn’t dare say face-to-face. How is this healthy? When they do get serious with someone, are they going to have to text to discuss problems, or are they just going to ignore them? No wonder relationships are in trouble.
Another area that young people have always dealt with is bullying. In the 1950’s, young people were expected to handle things themselves. My husband’s father told him to find an equalizer. What did that mean? He was expected to find the biggest stick he could find and defend himself. On one occasion my husband resorted to putting a tack in the front of his shoe. How did this help? The bully sat in front of him. Ouch!
I do believe we need to teach young people to be tougher and not allow people to get under their skin like they do. When a child says, “Mrs. Worthington, he’s looking at me,”I tend to expect them to get over it. However, there are other issues I take very seriously. But bullying has been taken up a notch. We now have cyberbullying. Relationships have turned into stalking in some cases. Some apps let the person or group that is “following” you know where you are at all times. The app lets the follower know if their special friend is at someone else’s house or at home. Spooky! Some young people are fussed at by their boyfriend or girlfriend if they don’t text them back right away. In my day, this was called stalking.
In the past, when young people left school, they would get a reprieve from the bullying. They could go home and be in a safe zone. Now, they are followed with it at home because they stay connected. It seems a simple answer to cut the phone off. But our young people are addicted to the online existence more than ever. Social Media is calling their name.
Along with that thought, young people want so badly to fit in. Many young people have struggled with peer pressure from the beginning of time. Depression and anxiousness are at an all-time high. What is to blame? Many claim that it is the online presence. People post their wonderful experiences of life and tell others how great things are, but they leave out the normal mundane affairs of life. Gullible young people and adults look at these posts and think that everyone’s life is better than their own. They become anxious because they don’t have what their “friends” do. They struggle to make their own life as great as the ones they see online.
And of course, sin is rampant! There has always been the opportunity to sin. When I was a teenager, I thought it was tough. And it was! There was always the forbidden fruit that the flesh made look so appealing. In most cases, you did have to think before you acted. If I had decided to watch a movie my parents had forbidden me to watch, I would have had to lie and say I was going to a movie with a friend. Then I would have to make sure I knew what the movie I said I went to was about. I would need to be sure nobody saw me at the movie that could tell my parents. It was quite an ordeal. Thankfully, I decided it wasn’t worth it. What about now? Many teenagers have access to anything they want on their cell phones. Sneaking to watch an inappropriate movie is a joke in today’s culture!
If parents aren’t careful, innocence will be lost. Children have the potential to be exposed to so much more at such an earlier age. Some parents say they monitor their child’s internet usage. That is a start, but many children have two or three accounts in the same app. The ones their parents see and the ones they set up for their friends. Also, the young people they associate with may not have the same rules that your child does. I challenge parents of today! Please be vigilant! I see so many problems stemming from the digital age. Our young people were so much better off before social media came into their lives. I am seeing the results of the digital age, and frankly, it frightens me.
Typically, according to statistics young people consume nine hours of screen time on any given day. That is as many hours as most adults spend at work. What is happening to our young people? Are the “screens” raising them? How much interaction do we have with our young people? Do we ask them about their day? Do we talk with them about the silly things so they will talk with us about the important? Do we send them away to play on their tablet or watch TV, or do we teach them what we are doing so they can learn beside us?
Proverbs 22:6says, “Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.” Great advice for any age!
Can you take this challenge with me? Keep up with how much time your child spends playing video games or watching TV. Find out about your child’s online presence! See what he is into! Better yet, limit or monitor screen time altogether. Training a child is a full-time challenge, especially in this digital world.
Stay informed and prayed up! Meet the challenge head-on!
Mrs. Worthington has five children and eleven grandchildren. She serves as Principal of Pathway Christian Academy in Goldsboro.