Relationships1

My summer schedule has been nice.  I have worked at the academy most of the summer with reduced hours, and I have been able to work on some home projects.  It is time to pick up the pace at the academy since the first day of school is around the corner.  We still have many things to do before we greet our children for the new school year.

I will enjoy seeing our families again, but as it is in your homes if you have school-aged children, life becomes a little more hectic.  The days are full and the nights are busy with homework and our daily responsibilities and activities.  It is easy to get lost in the busyness of our days.

If your day is like mine, it is busy from the time I roll out of bed until I place my head on my pillow.  The unfortunate thing about being busy is we sometimes forget the important things in life.  It takes time to build relationships, and when we get so busy doing things, many relationships suffer.

One of my favorite things about my summer schedule is that I have more time with my husband.  I can be home earlier, and my schedule is more flexible.  We can work on summer projects together and spend more time just enjoying each other’s company. I cherish every minute we have together.

Although we never know when our last moment on this earth will be, now that we are older, we realize there are less days ahead of us than behind us.  We have to make a constant effort not to let the busyness of life take over our relationship.  Our love can only grow deeper if we share life instead of just coexisting.

Many families are very busy of no fault of their own.  It often takes two incomes to run a household in this day and time.  It takes one income to pay the taxes and the child care, and the other income to pay the bills.  I realize that some families work extra hours for unnecessary luxuries, but in either case, the family suffers.

Both parents get off late and pick their children up from daycare, or some children are at home without supervision.  As soon as they arrive home it is a rush for dinner, baths, and homework.  Parents are tired and not always pleasant.  Parents rush their children to hurry up and finish so Mom and Dad can go to bed or do their own things.  Parents are on their phones or computers handling work issues or on social media. Relationships get pushed to the side.

When I was growing up, Mom worked, but she got off the same time we got out of school.  She picked us up from school, we came home, had a snack, did our chores and homework, then we played outside while she fixed dinner.  Dad arrived home and usually played with us outside or did outside chores.  We all sat around the dinner table and talked about our day.  After dinner, we got baths and usually watched a show together.

This was our habit until I became a teenager and got a job of my own.  But if I was off, I was expected to have dinner with the family.  We learned a lot about each other during those times.  How much do you know about your kids and grandkids?  Do you talk to them about their day and the struggles they may be having?  It is sad that many kids today have their faces in a tablet and have very little time to converse with their families.  They text more than they talk and want to solve all problems with a text message.  What happens when our children need us?  Are they going to feel comfortable talking about the serious problems when we weren’t there to talk about the little things?

What about our grandparents and the elderly in our homes and churches?  Many of them just want to be cared for and shown love.  What would you want if you were older and stuck at home?  It can get very lonely looking at four walls.  I know a very dear lady that loves the Lord and is so gracious.  She told me one day, “Normally, I do okay because I have my Jesus, but the four walls are closing in on me today.  Sometimes you just want some skin.”  What was she saying?  I want to be cared for and loved.  Please, someone take time for me.  She understood that everyone was “busy” but that did not change the desire of her heart.  She needed a hug.

We let so many things interfere with our relationships.  I believe that our electronics are one of the main causes of difficulty in relationships.  We don’t know how to communicate face to face.  It is easier if we just send a text message.  We will usually say harsher things when we know we can text–things we would never say if we were face to face.  We also spend time doing our own things. We don’t do things together.  We need to share.  Why do we sit on the couch side by side on our cell phones?  There are so many other electronics that get in the way of relationships such as television, game systems, as well as other hobbies, whatever they may be.

I know the biggest culprit that hurts our relationships is just selfishness.  We want to spend our time the way we want to spend it.  I guess that is the bottom line.  If we examine ourselves, we will realize that we don’t want to put forth the effort to make a relationship work.

The saddest case of all is when anything hinders our relationship with God.  Matthew 6:33 says, “But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.”  We don’t want to invest the time to draw closer to God.  All we have to do to make things work in our other relationships is to put God first.  Does that mean that everything will be perfect?  No, it just means that if we are serving God and putting Him first, we will be at peace that we have done our part to follow His will and serve Him. We cannot control other people, but we can control our actions.

What are we putting first today?  Are we putting money or our own pleasures first in our lives?  Are we putting our phones and our game systems above our families?  Are we pushing God to the side and saying, “Maybe later, God.  I am too busy right now.”  Stop, and examine your life today!  Is God first, or is He on the sidelines?  We need to let God plan our day, and He will help us with all of our relationships.  He is the only one that can fix them.  Let Him today!

Mrs. Worthington has five children and twelve grandchildren.  She serves as Principal of Pathway Christian Academy in Goldsboro.

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